Jumbled

My thoughts are all jumbled right now, I really should be studying. I am having that small anxiety attack I always get when the time gets nearer to calling my Bonus Son. Lately, its been worse than ever. Mostly because he is starting to treat me like dirt, scratch that. He is starting to talk to me like his mother does at freaking seven. I know its not really him talking because its not his personality but, it still hurts a bit. I pray to the goddess that I can find a freaking play therapist who is open on weekends so we can get him into counseling once Hubby gets back. Until then, all I can do is call like I always do and hope I can visit him throughout the year.

I have been trying to study to take my mind off well, my mind. Its working somewhat, I have gotten farther into my latest book and that is always a good thing. Birth As An American Rite Of Passage, is really opening my eyes to a lot of the problems with the technocratic model of birth. I thought I had my eyes open pretty well already, boy was I wrong. Its different to read things in print than to see them in a movie such as The Business Of Being Born. I can't wait to see what the rest of my studies teach me.

In other news, looks like Hubby will be in Kuwait by my birthday. Its a mixed blessing because while its nice to start that pay up, its gonna suck if he can't call me on my birthday. We have been so lucky in the last deployment that he was able to call on the special occasions. I hope that trend continues for this deployment as well.